I am a single mother of 2 daughters who are 12 & 10. They have this amazing love-hate relationship.
Getting them to communicate seems impossible; between the bickering, picking on each other and constant competition I hardly hear a nice word between the two of them. When they do speak they usually say “I Don’t want to talk to you right now” and proceed to ignore each other. Trying to get them to help each other, even with simple things is exhausting and usually unsuccessful.
I tell them all the time they need to learn to talk to each other nicely and learn to like each other but it doesn’t seem to do any good. The times I notice they are being nice and I commend their actions, no more than 5 minutes later they are back to arguing. I often wonder how will we ever get through the next few years?!? Then one night I noticed how things really are. The other night they were in bed, both on their cell phones and very quiet. I told them it was bed time and they both said they were in the middle of an important text conversation and could they have 5 more minutes so I agreed.
A few hours later I went in to check on them and I put their phones on the charger. Being a Mom I looked at my older daughter’s text messages… come to find out that important conversation she was having was with her sister in the bunk bed above. They hadn’t spoken a word to each other but there were tons of texts between them saying they loved each other and apologizing for being so mean to each other all the time and justifying it by saying it’s a sister’s job to be mean.
I couldn’t help but laugh and be grateful they have cell phones; they can’t talk but they can text! I guess that’s a start to communicating.
Maybe the next few years won’t be as bad as I thought!